How can I unstick myself from feeling stuck!
There are times I know from my own life and experience that I’ve felt utterly stuck and totally unclear what the hell to do about it. My ultimate fallback is to ask some different questions. Not the ones that disempower us and keep us stuck, such as:
what am I doing wrong here?
why can’t I change this?
why does this keep happening to me?
what’s wrong with me?
These questions just keep us going round and round in circles and are conclusions and judgements with question marks attached.
If you’re feeling stuck and not sure what to do about it, you may like to have a play with the following 10 questions:
What do I feel is missing from my life right now? It’s worth making a list of maybe 3-5 things that you feel are missing and then start looking at what you can do today to start adding them to your life.
What is it I really want most right now? What’s needed to add it to your life? Again, what actions and choices can you make to start the ball rolling? I used to think it was money that I wanted, but really it was peace of mind and less stress. When I started working on those, I was in a better place to be able to start creating more money more easily and more enjoyably!
Is there information that I don’t currently have that would help me change this? Sometimes what’s missing is information that will change things up and guide you to what action is needed to change something. If we don’t know what’s going on with our body but something is clearly out of synch, having information to explain what is going on can be a really great starting place for taking action to change it.
What do I like and appreciate about my life already? Sometimes when feeling stuck it’s because we are focused only upon the things we don’t like or that are not working well for us and we fail to look at what is working well and what we do like.
What do I feel is stopping or blocking me right now? Is that actually true? Look at what is actually going on and what you have available to you. For example, before I could afford a laptop I still wanted to be able to work wherever I went. What do I have available right now to get around this? I had an ipad and a wireless keyboard. Not as good as a laptop for sure, but it did allow me to still be able to work remotely - which is how I wrote the chapter of a book I was published in whilst sitting in a quiet cafe near to where I live!
What skills are needed to be able to take this forward? Do I have them? If not, where can I start learning them? Not all training and skills development has to be about paying for a course or training program. There is a lot of free training, guides, and tips available on the internet - especially on Youtube and TikTok. Start with where you are and build from there
Is there an action or choice I’ve been avoiding? We’ve all been there - putting off making the call, taking the action etc. When I felt financially stuck in debt I knew I was avoiding actually looking at my financial situation. What I had, how much I owed, what I was actually earning, and how much was going out. I put it off for over 30 years! I don’t avoid it any more and I’m so glad I don’t!
Is there a habit I have that I know is not helping here? Habits are not always bad and unhelpful. There are habits that really assist with enjoying and having a relaxed life. Eating and sleeping from habit rather than from awareness and question are two that can really screw us over. I used to go to bed at 9pm and get up at 5am out of habit. Whether i wanted to or not. I used to eat at 8am 1230pm and 7pm out of habit - not from actually being present with my body and whether it was even hungry or not. If we don’t get clear on what our habits are and be present with them, we can end up being controlled and limited by them.
Is there someone who can help me with this? When it came to finding a website provider that met my needs, was easy to use, and didn’t cost me an arm and a leg I spent weeks searching the internet and reading reviews and just getting myself mired in too much information. In the end I called a friend who designs various different types of website for a living and asked for her advice and guidance. I ended up with my current provider that I didn’t even know about and I’m so grateful I did. And of course, you can speak to a coach and have a session or two as a way of getting a new and different perspective. Having a coach doesn’t make you mad or weak - quite the opposite from my point of view. It shows a great sense of awareness, self respect, vulnerability, and strength in knowing when another perspective could really be what’s needed right now.
Am I making this harder than it needs to be? Like for when I was searching for a new website provider, I tried to do it all myself. I was reluctant to ask for help for all sorts of crazy reasons and it made it much harder for me to get started on creating the website. So… is there an easier option you can pursue? Would you be willing to ask for help?
Questions are a great way of getting energy moving…. once it’s moving, we can build upon the momentum… what questions can you ask today that will get the energy moving in a different direction and in a different way?